( & for today , i'm just typing out my emotions , please be understanding . )
' ; A H X I A N 's @ letting you go
I don't get it ...
I've been telling myself t stay strong , battled those obstacles .
But in th end , i fall back again & again .
But all i get is back t square one , i'm tired .
Why is it that whenever i tried i still get th same thing ?
I tried my very best but , i still failed .
I'm trying to stay strong but , i can't .
I break into tears one corner all alone , alone .
Why is it i'm trying t act happy all along ?
Yes , i'm tired but does anybody knows ?
I don't wish t act tough anymore , i admit that i'm weak .
I don't want t suffer all this all alone ...
I need a shoulder t lean on when i cry , a person there .
I'm really tired of everything , maybe it's really i start to ignore .
Ignore everything ...
I wish that I've the guts , the guts to walk away .
The guts to walk away & leave everything behind .
The guts to walk away & start afresh .
Or maybe I was too late by a little ...
Just by a little too late to walk away & start afresh .
Teacher's , classmate's says i'm a bad influence .
Bad influence , that's me ; Shuxian .
Yes , i'm always the one ... Always .
Whenever i tried to speak up my thoughts , they will tell me to be quite .
You know how it feels in my heart deep down ?
It's miserable , it's sucks , it's utter sadness .
I don't want this anymore , it sucks totally .
You won't know how much i felt when i'm being told to shut up .
Thank's all my lovely classmate's to tell me to shut up when i wanna speak up .
Thank's for Ms Chong to tell her lovely student's that i'm a bad influence .
If you ; Ms Chong think you're better then why student's still hate you ?
I know being a teacher ain't easy but you think telling people to stay away from me makes
your life much more easier ?
If you think it is then , i shall stay away from your student's .
I'll gain that courage of mine to ignore everything , put down everything .
I'm sick , tired , stress of everything .
When i say enough is enough , it's time to put things aside .
That's the day , i really give up .
Well , everything is just too late ...
A little too late for me to start new , start afresh .
Flung my exams , screw my life , that's it .
Life's not fair & nobody said it wasn't .
It's just that i screw it up with my own hand .
I'm trying hard to move on & live on ...
Although it's hard breathing on , living on , i still have to .
Cause , living like a bitch in every person's eye ain't easy after all .
Everything is just too late , a little too late for me to start afresh .
Since I've chosen this path , what's there else for me to turn back ...
What's there else for me to turn back & say , I've regretted ?
What's there else for me to turn back & say , forgive all my mistakes & let me start afresh ?
Even I've , whose there for me to trust on once again ?
Everything ain't same if i turn back & say , i want it back & start afresh .
But right now , i'm turning back but not to start afresh .
But turn back with a smile on my face , a slight tear on my cheek & say , i'm leaving .
Turn back with a smile on my face , a slight tear on my face & say , I'm not coming back .
Turn back with a smile on my face , a slight tear on my face & bid goodbye to my past .
Cause , i ain't coming back to my past & collect them with me when i move on .
I'll only be there browsing through those hardship I've been through .
Tomorrow is my exam , it's where i either flung or succeed .
It's all up to how i handle them ...
It's no longer about how things work in my life , with buddies , with classmate's nor teacher's .
Maybe , today shall be the last ...
Last time i fall back , back to those pains , hurts , tears ...
Cause , i really don't wish to be back anymore .
I really wanne leave here with a smile on my cheek , a slight tear on my face bidding goodbye with words coming out from my mouth saying , I'm leaving , i'm not coming back anymore my past , i'm moving on & on ...
That's all i want it to be ...
